End of the walkway

So, let’s fast forward to the present day.

4 and a half years passed since my thumb tip tragic amputation. This is how it looks now.

As you can see, it definitely does not look default, despite the many costly and risky surgeries. The last one also left another scar on my body.
That’s where the bone was taken for auto-transplantation.

Three years, and it is still there.
Last week I sold the equipment that caused this amputation. Not that it really bothered me to still own it, but getting rid of it felt good anyway. And it also brought some philosophical notes, like what would’ve been if I didn’t have to use it that day? Or even if I purchased completely different equipment, without that sharp edges?
Anyway, the life still goes on. I don’t think about the lost finger all day long as I used to. Maybe, once a month or so.
I still hope for some miraculous medical technology to regrow my lost fingertip back. Who knows, everything develops so fast.
Well, I guess that’s all to this personal tragedy of mine. I cease regular site updates from now on.
Thank you for your time.

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12 thoughts on “End of the walkway”

  1. littlefinger

    Howdy! bin followin ur story for the past few days. wat brings me here? well google had a lot to do with it……[:)]….and the fact that my right thumb-tip got amputated in a tragic accident which wasn’t very unlike yours. Just wanted u to know that u ain’t alone man. Well frankly I would really like to chat wid u since I know u wuld understand me as I surely do understand u. Also I culd use some advice and stuff……..lemme know if u can spare the time. Also wuld like to share pics of my thumb wid u(if u’d like to see)…lemme me know if that’s possible.

  2. hi. you may post the pics here in the comments, this is very private as no one reads this blog anyway. 🙂
    I will have a look, but please keep in my I’m not a doctor and my opinion could not ever be considered the ultimate truth, but just a view of a fellow sufferer.

  3. littlefinger

    NP. But I’d rather take ur opinion than a doc’s. I have already been to several ‘specialists’ nd all i got were false promises and assurances. To be honest I am quite disappointed in medical science. I mean, considering the phenomenal developments in other branches of science, here medical science cant even help u get ‘default’ and that too in the yr 2014??!!! I don’t think medical science has kept pace with the rest of the scientific world. The docs these days r only interested in money. Hardly any of them go into research. No wonder that the patients have so few options after an accident. Just consider this- When my fingertip got amputated, the first ‘specialist’ I consulted just re-bandaged my thumb nd suggested that I allow it to heal naturally as there was nothing else that could be done. He said surgery was likely to fail and that my best option was to let it just heal naturally even though it was likely to be deformed and misshapen. I couldn’t believe wat I was hearing. For so long I had marveled at the wonders of modern day plastic surgery(newspaper, internet, magazines) and in just one rude awakening, I had come to realize that it was all sh*t!!! Never had i felt so completely helpless. I am sure u can relate… But I think I have said too much…(my angst gets the better of me sometimes)…so, gettin back to the topic— here are a few pics of my thumb–

    Note- I have had v-y plastic surgery and even though the doc said that he could help me retain entire length that hasn’t happened. Infact its a whole cm shorter that my default thumb. 🙁

    http://tinypic.com/r/v624cm/8
    [IMG]http://i58.tinypic.com/v624cm.jpg[/IMG]

    http://tinypic.com/r/213r9jp/8
    [IMG]http://i58.tinypic.com/213r9jp.jpg[/IMG]

    http://tinypic.com/r/2q013zl/8
    [IMG]http://i59.tinypic.com/2q013zl.jpg[/IMG]

    http://tinypic.com/r/6p56on/8
    [IMG]http://i58.tinypic.com/6p56on.jpg[/IMG]

  4. well I can feel your pain. I’ve been told almost the same, however not promised. after several thousand dollars in surgery bills, it still lacks at least 0.5cm PS: who’s that penis belongs to?

  5. Only 0.5 cm, eh? That aint quite so bad man! I am actually quite curious abt this ‘hi-tech’ surgery that u had. I mean I have seen the pics that u posted—the b4 nd aftr— still its difficult to judge from the pics alone. I wanted to know how much length u managed to gain through the surgery. Also, post-operation, hows the sensitivity in ur thumb like. Are there any scars visible on ur thumb?
    I was quite disappointed with the v-y surgery that I had. The sensory feedback from the pulled up skin on my thumb is quite low. Also there is a prominent V shaped scar on the underside of my thumb ( thank heavens it ain’t a Y shaped one! lolzz!!!). Also if u notice in the pics, my thumb has a lot of extra loose flesh now which makes it splay when I grip something tightly with it. Do u have any such complications?
    Sorry for throwing so many questions at u. U r the only one I know right now who can answer. By all means take ur time, there is no hurry 🙂

    PS- May I know ur age? I’ll turn 26 this July. Also, by ‘penis’ I imagine u mean my thumb. Well, I dont mind tellin ( if u havn’t found out already) –I have actually posted a pic of my penis on TinyPic (no homo and certainly no perv). I actually meant it for a medical and health related website. U see, I have a slight problem with my instrument and I needed someone to check it out and give some opinion.

  6. Too much flesh is actually good. My second surgery was to restore the bone – they took out a small piece out of my ass (literally) and attached it as a missing fragment at the very tip of the bone, since a piece of bone was blasted away with the flesh and toenail by the accident. So maybe you should consult reconstructive surgeon who specializes in bone auto transplants? If they restore the bone, they can stretch the flesh onto it. Both aesthetic and practical results should be great.
    My brain reconfigured sensivity for more than a year, since nerves facing down are now facing sideways on the flap. Now, 5 years past, it’s more acute and still feels a bit numb, but almost as the default finger.

    PS: I’m mature enough to refer body parts by their medical terms. The penis I’m talking about is a picture (http://tinypic.com/view.php?pic=213r9td&s=8#.U5g7aoWGyUk) that massive shlong on a nude man near your thumb (http://tinypic.com/view.php?pic=213r9jp&s=8#.U5g7qYWGyUl). Now I understand it’s just a random pic, not your photostream.

  7. Oh…that one!! naah…i wudn’t dare pose like that where i am frm. Srry abt the mixup…I wasn’t really questioning ur maturity, man…its jus that since u had posted the article on Vince Vaughn and wat he calls his ‘penis’ thumb I thought u were jus emulating his sense of humour. Well, nevermind…. getting back to the topic- bone auto transplants? I see. But wat abt the nailbed? I mean even if the bone length were to be increased, the nailbed length wuld still remain the same ryt? Wont that cause a problem?

    PS- u didnt mention anythin abt the post operative scars also can u tell me how old u r? (I will turn 26 nxt month).

  8. When I had the auto-transplantation surgery, they also wanted to tear off a skin flap from inside of my arm to cover the excessive bone autotransplant. However, they were able to stretch existing skin on the thumb over the now extended bone.
    So in your case, if you say you have excessive flesh, they will certainly be able to cover the autotransplated bone. The amount of bone missing can be seen on a simple Xray.
    As for the nailbed, it is actually formed by the growing nail. I’m struggling now to get rid of air cavities between the nail and the flesh under it. It doesn’t stick too well as I’m missing most of the right groove which drives the nail straight.

  9. Hi. Srry for replyin late. I consulted the hand surgeon who had performed the v-y on my thumb. Well, he thinks that I shouldn’t opt for any more surgeries. He examined my thumb and concluded that it lookes gr8 (he seemed very pleased with his own work!!!) and when i told him abt me thinkin of gettin bone transplanted he rejected the idea sayin that many people by default have one finger bone smaller than another. In short he is quite satisfied that he has been able to restore full functionality to my thumb and couldn’t be less concerned with the way it looks now…!!! Guess its time to look for another specialist?
    Actually i am being a bit too harsh on him. Truth be told he did all that he could. However, I am still unsure if I got the best treatment possible. I mean for one thing, I seem to have a lot of surgical scars on my thumb including a prominent V-shaped one! Second and most importantly, is the extra flesh and skin. Now, I know that u say it is a good thing, but bro, it looks awful! I mean as soon as I grab somethin a bit too tighly is it goes like completely flat(splay) kinda like a frog’s neck!. I was wondering, is it possible to have just the extra flesh and skin removed?

  10. Yes, you have to seek for another doctor. They tend to be very very sticky to the ways they learned once, while medicine is a rapidly changing science. You’re angst and the excessive tissue is a perfect reasoning for the bone transplant.

  11. yeah…i will probably go see another doc. By the way, I was surfing on the internet when I came across this-

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JPXHhLS9E9U

    The doc claims that they can regrow cut-off fingers with the help of this revolutionary new technology. I believe they call the substance – extra cellular matrix. Its based on the stem-cell technology. Apparently, on being applied to the amputated part, it signals the body to begin regrowth. The guy in the video was supposedly able to regenerate his entire fingertip back- flesh, nail and bone!! What do you think of it?

  12. Good to hear you seek another doctor’s advice. The biggest danger with stem cells is that they can grow into literally any cell, cancer cell included. The video is not trustworthy, but I would do some research on this. Meanwhile you may read about other regeneration scams on this site.

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